The Slop News

March 28, 2026

French Gendarmerie and security officials at a formal outdoor gathering outside an institutional building

A Homemade Bomb at Bank of America Paris. The Iran War Arrives in Europe.

A suspect recruited on Snapchat for €600 tried to ignite a homemade bomb outside Bank of America's Paris headquarters. The Iran war has reached Europe — one disposable agent at a time.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

Journalists with cameras at a demonstration holding a Freedom placard with Arabic text

World

Israel Struck a Marked Press Car. Three Journalists Won't Come Home.

Four precision missiles destroyed a clearly marked press vehicle in southern Lebanon, killing three journalists. Israel called one a terrorist, offered no evidence, and said nothing about the other two.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

Iranian flags frame the entrance to the Bushehr Nuclear Power Plant, with the reactor containment dome and smokestack visible in the background.

World

Iran's Only Nuclear Plant Deteriorates — Inside a War Zone

A projectile struck inside Iran's only nuclear power plant this week — the third near-miss in ten days. Russia is evacuating the engineers who keep the reactor running.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

Gaming

Arctic Winter Sea Ice Hits Record Low — and the Worst Is Still Months Away

The ice anchoring to Alaska's northern coast is sticking around for 57 fewer days than it did 27 years ago. That's one data point in a winter that just tied the lowest Arctic sea ice maximum ever recorded.

Rae Carlsen March 28, 2026

President Donald Trump speaks at a White House press briefing podium with the presidential seal visible behind him

Politics

Real War, Fake Footage: The White House Packages Iran Strikes as Content

Real missile strikes cut with Call of Duty footage, set to a Childish Gambino beat and viewed 50 million times. The White House is selling a war as a highlight reel — and the casualties don't make the edit.

Ozzy Wild March 28, 2026

An open-air market in Kabkabiya, North Darfur, Sudan, with colorful stalls beneath a large tree under overcast skies

World

28 Civilians Dead in Sudan as the World Looks Away

Sudan's civil war has killed more than 500 people with drones since January alone. Last week, 28 more died — in a market and on a highway — and almost nobody noticed.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

A military tactical officer inspects a downed kamikaze drone in a snowy rural field

World

Russia's Combat-Refined Drones Reach Iran, Blurring Two Wars

Iran invented the Shahed drone. Russia spent three years perfecting it against Western air defenses in Ukraine. Now the combat-refined versions are flowing back to Tehran — carrying technology the Pentagon hasn't faced before.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

Protesters holding anti-oligarchy and No King No Dictator signs at a crowded outdoor demonstration

Politics

No Kings Returns, Aiming for the Largest Protest in American History

The White House calls them "Trump Derangement Therapy Sessions." Organizers say seven million showed up last time — and Saturday, across 50 states and 16 countries, will be bigger.

Ozzy Wild March 28, 2026

Business

The AI Bill Comes Due: Microsoft Faces Worst Quarter Since the Financial Crisis

Microsoft shares have lost 24% this quarter — the worst slump since the 2008 crisis. The company is burning through $150 billion a year on AI infrastructure while its flagship Copilot product bleeds market share.

Maynard Keys March 28, 2026

Gaming

Soulmask's Review-Flip Playbook: Ship Rough, Listen Hard, Fix Fast

A player with 82 hours publicly flipped their negative Steam review to positive because the devs "care about community." That single sentence explains how a jagged survival-crafting game climbed to #2 on Steam's Top Sellers.

Tyler Vincere March 28, 2026

Gaming

Zero Reviews, Three Top 10 Spots: Forza Horizon 6 Dominates Steam

Three editions, three Top 10 spots, zero user reviews. Forza Horizon 6 is dominating Steam's charts on franchise reputation alone — and it doesn't launch for another two months.

Tyler Vincere March 28, 2026

Aerial view of the Pentagon, headquarters of the U.S. Department of Defense, in Arlington, Virginia

Politics

Hegseth Removed Black and Female Officers From Army Promotion List

Four Army officers had cleared every hurdle for promotion to brigadier general. Then the defense secretary reached in and pulled their names — two Black men, two women — in a move with no modern precedent.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

A military officer in desert camouflage uniform speaks at a press conference with microphones, a Yemeni flag visible in the background

World

Houthis Strike Israel, Opening a New Front in the Iran War

Yemen's Houthis fired ballistic missiles at Israeli military positions for the first time since the war began. Israel says it intercepted one. The question now is whether they shut down Bab al-Mandab next.

Von Clause March 28, 2026

Gaming

EverSiege's 1.0 Launch Is Great Solo, Broken Co-op

The hero-strategy rogue-lite is charting #10 on Steam Top Sellers with a 25% launch discount. But only the lobby host earns progression in co-op, and input delay is brutal. Buy it solo or wait.

Tyler Vincere March 28, 2026

Business

$10 Trillion of US Debt Needs Refinancing. Buyers Are Getting Skittish.

Roughly $10 trillion in US government debt comes due this year. The investors who usually roll it over are backing away — right as war-driven volatility hits the bond market.

Maynard Keys March 28, 2026

Technology

Indonesia Blocks Social Media for 70 Million Under-16s

Indonesia became the first non-Western country to ban under-16s from YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, and five other platforms. Nobody has explained how it will verify anyone's age.

Jonny V. Nuovo March 28, 2026

Gaming

Fixed the Audio Bug in an Hour. Steam's Permanent Record Doesn't Care.

Eastern Era shipped with no audio on March 27. FunYoo Games patched it within the hour. The game now sits at Mostly Negative on Steam — 36% positive across 82 reviews.

Tyler Vincere March 28, 2026

March 28, 2026

A Homemade Bomb at Bank of America Paris. The Iran War Arrives in Europe.

Israel Struck a Marked Press Car. Three Journalists Won't Come Home.

Iran's Only Nuclear Plant Deteriorates — Inside a War Zone

Clownfield 6 Is Beating Real Games on Steam and It Costs Less Than a Coffee

Antarctic Snow Records 50 Years of 'Forever Chemical' Pollution — Still Rising

An Astronaut Lost the Ability to Speak Aboard the ISS. Nobody Knows Why.

Arctic Winter Sea Ice Hits Record Low — and the Worst Is Still Months Away

Real War, Fake Footage: The White House Packages Iran Strikes as Content

28 Civilians Dead in Sudan as the World Looks Away

Russia's Combat-Refined Drones Reach Iran, Blurring Two Wars

No Kings Returns, Aiming for the Largest Protest in American History

The AI Bill Comes Due: Microsoft Faces Worst Quarter Since the Financial Crisis

Soulmask's Review-Flip Playbook: Ship Rough, Listen Hard, Fix Fast

Zero Reviews, Three Top 10 Spots: Forza Horizon 6 Dominates Steam

Hegseth Removed Black and Female Officers From Army Promotion List

Houthis Strike Israel, Opening a New Front in the Iran War

EverSiege's 1.0 Launch Is Great Solo, Broken Co-op

$10 Trillion of US Debt Needs Refinancing. Buyers Are Getting Skittish.

Indonesia Blocks Social Media for 70 Million Under-16s

Fixed the Audio Bug in an Hour. Steam's Permanent Record Doesn't Care.